The holidays should be a joyous time of the year. They provide opportunities for activities that are out-of-the-ordinary, the celebration of traditions, promote togetherness and simply offer a ‘warm and fuzzy’ feeling.  However, as the parent of a special needs child, the holiday season may present a few extra challenges.

Last week we talked about your children and how to help them through the holidays. This week, it’s all about you, the parents, and providing you with the tools to support yourself this season.

Celebrations and activities that are out of the norm can certainly cause confusion, which can lead to an upset child – and upset parents – during the holiday season.

If you are the parent of a special needs child, don’t greet the holiday season with worry at the thought of being stressed. With some proper planning, you can enjoy the holiday season with your child to the fullest.

Here are some simple, yet powerful tips that will make your holiday merry and bright.

1. Live in the Moment:

It’s great to have plans, but when it comes to children, especially special needs children, plans can change at the drop of a hat. You can certainly make your holiday plans, but be willing to adjust them based on your child’s reaction. Live in the moment and go with the flow. Your kids will only be young and carefree for so long, enjoy it while you can!

2. Make it Simple:

Yes, the holidays are often about elaborate celebrations filled with great fanfare; however, such events may not be received well by children with special needs. Remember that consistency is key with special needs children. Include some special activities for you to enjoy, but don’t go overboard, as to avoid unwanted stress.

3. Prioritize:

What is most important to you during the holiday season? Is it going to church to celebrate? Decorating? Partaking in a traditional family event? Choose one or two things that are of particular importance to you and focus your energy on making those events a success.

4. Have an Emergency Plan:

You never know when things can go awry; which is as true for parents of typically developing children as it is for parents of children with special needs. Have a plan in place, should things go sour to add extra security during the chaos of the holidays.

5. Prepare:

The element of surprise isn’t always the best with special needs children. Taking your child to a parade that interrupts part of his or her daily routine can be quite upsetting. Prepare your child for the changes and discuss events early and in detail so your child knows what to expect in order to reduce the chances of a meltdown.

6. Keep Track:

When preparing your child for upcoming holiday events, keeping track of when the event will occur can benefit both you and your child. Post a calendar and count down the days until the event happens. Having a goal in sight can create much excitement and help keep you focused on the positive.

7. Think Twice:

Really think about an event and your child’s reaction before you decide to go. If your child is noise sensitive and the event includes loud noises, it might be in everyone’s best interest to avoid such an event. It is easy to get carried away with the planning of the holiday season, however, taking the time to carefully think about your plans may help you avoid much stress.

8. Enlist Help:

Remember that there is no shame in asking for help. The holidays are stressful enough for anyone, and they can be particularly more-so for the parent of a special needs child. Ask for help from friends and family members. A little help can go a long way.

9. Take a Deep Breath:

Remember that nothing in life is perfect. Stay as cool, calm and collected as possible. Your child will play off of your emotions and when your tensions are high, your child will react – and likely in a negative way.

10. Go Easy on Yourself:

Contrary to popular belief, you aren’t a super hero. Despite your best efforts, things can go wrong. Don’t beat yourself up if a meltdown occurs or you can’t attend to everything you planned. Life happens, roll with it and make sure to take some time for yourself and take care of your needs.

Slow down, show yourself some compassion, and enjoy the present moment this holiday season!

Activities that encourage creativity and wonder, that promote the use of the senses and that promote discovery are wonderful for all children; but they are especially beneficial for children with special needs.

These activities can help teach valuable skills in a way that children with special needs can relate to, they can stimulate the senses, promote attention building strategies and simply serve as a source of fun and excitement.

Hands-on activities that relate to the real world are a fantastic way to teach children with special needs about the world that surrounds them in a way that they can better understand. With Thanksgiving just around the corner, teach your special needs child about the traditions and customs that are associated with the holiday with these engaging and fun-filled activities.

1. Thanksgiving Smelling Station:

This holiday is filled with delightful scents. Use these scents as a teaching tool to promote a better understanding of the sense of smell by setting up a Thanksgiving Smelling Station.

How it works:

• Fill containers with different elements that create scents that are often associated with Thanksgiving; cinnamon, pumpkin and nutmeg, for example.

• Cover the containers with a gossamer type of fabric so that they can’t see what’s inside, but can still smell the contents of the containers

• Let the kids see and smell the different elements in the station

• Then, let them put the power of their noses to work by smelling the disguised containers and trying to identify what element is in each one

2. Turkey Baster Water Transfer:

Encourage the development of fine motor skills and a little science with a turkey baster water transfer.

How it works:

• Set out two bowls, one filled with water and one empty

• Teach your children how to use a turkey baster and fill it with water

• Then, have them use the baster to transfer water from one bowl to the other

The act of squeezing the tool promotes fine motor development, and you can discuss why the water is being pulled up into the baster to add a little scientific discovery into the activity.

3. Thanksgiving Matching:

Put your child’s memory to the test with a Thanksgiving matching game.

How it works:

• Print out pictures of Thanksgiving-related images onto index cards, with two cards for each image

• Lay the cards face down and have your children try to match the cards with the same images together

• Lastly, discuss the names of the images to promote language development

4. Turkey Feather Counting:

Promote number recognition and one-to-one correspondence with this simple, yet fun activity.

How it works:

• Draw images of turkeys without feathers on a sheet of paper (you don’t have to be an artist, just do the best you can)

• On the body of each turkey, write a number

• Ask children to identify the number on each turkey

• Then, glue the number of feathers onto the turkey that corresponds to the number on its body

5. Write “I’m Thankful” Letters:

Teach your children what the real meaning of Thanksgiving is by having them write “I’m Thankful” letters.

How it works:

• Discuss the definition of the word “thankful” and talk about things that you are thankful for

• Encourage children to think about and share things that they are thankful for

• Have them write a letter to someone to express what they are thankful for, or help them write a letter

• Then, they can get creative and illustrate what they are thankful for

• And lastly, encourage them to share their letters with the family

This activity can help promote language and literacy development, and help define the meaning of thankfulness.

With these simple activities, you can foster a greater understanding of Thanksgiving and promote the development of important life skills in special needs children. Additionally, you will help to make this holiday even more memorable and meaningful for all involved.

Education can lay the foundation for the future success of individuals. This is true for all individuals, both typically developing and those who have been diagnosed with a disability.

Setting goals is an important part of ensuring that academic success is met for all, but it is particularly important for those with a disability. Children who have been diagnosed with a disability typically require specialized modifications and accommodations in order to ensure that their educational needs are met.

If you are the parent of a child with special needs, you play an integral role in this academic goal setting process. Knowing what types of goals to set and how to go about achieving those goals will help to ensure that your child receives the best possible education and that he or she is as prepared as possible for the road ahead.

Here are five things that you should take into consideration when you are setting academic goals for your special needs child:

Ask Your Child About His or Her Goals:

Your child is the one you are setting these academic goals for, so it only makes sense that he or she should be involved in the goal setting process.

Ask your child about the types of goals that he/she wants to achieve. What does he or she want to be when they grow up? What do they want to learn? What does he/she hope to do with his/her life? Knowing your child’s personal goals will allow you to set academic goals that will enable them to work towards something they want.

Consider Your Goals:

All parents have goals for their children. What will make your child happy? What do you want your child to achieve in life? Considering the life goals that you have for your child will help you to set academic goals that will enable him or her to reach these objectives.

Model:

As a parent, you are one of the most powerful role models in your child’s life. Your child is your mirror and he or she will reflect what you do. Modeling proper ways to effectively achieve academic goals is crucial for your child’s scholastic success. Not only is it important to teach your child how to achieve those goals, but also to be your child’s biggest support.

Be your own kid’s cheerleader. Instill in them the self-confidence that he/she can do whatever they put their mind to. Be sure to celebrate success, for this will help reinforce those good behaviors that helped him or her get there.

Overcoming Obstacles:

Life is full of obstacles. If your child has special needs, these obstacles may include jumping across academic hurdles. Think about the types of obstacles that your child may face and how he or she will be able to successfully overcome those obstacles so as to achieve desired academic success.

Handling Setbacks:

Just as obstacles are a part of life, so are setbacks. Things don’t always go according to plan; but when a setback occurs, it is how you handle the situation that will help to determine future success.

Take into consideration any setbacks that may occur and teach your child how to successfully overcome and move past them. Teach your child how to keep his or her chin up, how to reassess the situation, and how to approach it in a new way so as to achieve success.

With this food for thought, you can help your special needs child set academic goals that he/she can successfully and confidently achieve.

Whether you are a parent with a special needs child, or just an interested party wanting to learn more about special education, here is a brief history and introduction into what you will need to know.

Special Education: A History

With the final regulations of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) passing in 2011, the current laws protecting children who have disabilities that interfere with their learning are stronger than they have been in decades.

It was only as recently as 1975 that students with disabilities were permitted to be taught in public schools by law. Before the Education of All Handicapped Children Act of 1975, students with disabilities were often segregated, denied education, or held back in school. This Act was amended to the current law today, which is the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA).

IDEA guarantees all students with disabilities, from ages 3 to 22, the right to education without discrimination.

Areas of Disability that Qualify for Special Education Services

There are 13 major categories of disability that may qualify a child for Special Education services:

Hard of Hearing, Deaf, Deaf-Blind, Visually Impaired, Speech and Language Impaired, Specific Learning Disability, Multi-Handicapped, Orthopedically Impaired, Mental Retardation, Autism, Emotional Disturbance, Traumatic Brain Injury, and Other Health Impaired.

A disability, however, does not automatically enroll a child into Special Education services, even if the disability falls into one of the above categories. The child’s educational performance must be affected by the disability as well.

A team, consisting of the parents, the child’s current teacher (or a teacher qualified to teach a child of comparable age), and one or more of the following: school psychologist, speech pathologist, remedial reading teacher, or other individuals qualified to conduct assessments of children, will make the determination if the child has a disability that requires Special Education services to assist in learning.

Overview of the Special Education Process

Step 1: Determining need.

In order to enroll a child into special education, your child will first need to be diagnosed. The doctors or experts will then assess your child to determine whether special instruction tailored to your child’s need would assist in his or her education. This evaluation considers the impact of the disability on your child’s ability to progress in a standard education setting.

Step 2: Formally assessing the need.

Once the evaluators decide that your child needs or would benefit from special education, a variety of tests are administered to gain an overview of your child’s current academic performance, strengths, and weaknesses.

Step 3: Individualized Education Program (IEP) and initial meeting.

This step involves creating a specialized learning plan for your child. IDEA requires the school to create a plan no later than 30 days after assessment for a child with special needs. During the first meeting, when the IEP is set, your child’s needs and goals will be discussed.

Step 4: Progress updates and annual meetings.

After the first IEP meeting, you will meet with your child’s educators every year to discuss progress and goals, modifying the IEP as needed.

Knowing Your Child’s Rights

Under IDEA, all students with special needs are entitled to “free and appropriate public education (FAPE).” Your school district is required to work with you in addressing your child’s special needs and in providing an educational environment with content as similar as possible to students without special needs.

If you do not agree with the IEP that has been recommended, it is your right to challenge the IEP or request a mediation. As the parent, however, you will be required to prove that the IEP is inadequate.

Once an IEP has been discussed and agreed upon, school districts have 10 days to provide the necessary support, teachers, and materials for the assisted learning program set for your child.

You also have the right to request a meeting at any time before the annual progress report, and a meeting will have to be held within 30 days of the request.

If your child is falling behind in school due to special needs, a disability, or undiagnosed issues, special education is required by law to be available to address those issues. The assessment process and progress report development takes time—but the school districts are under a strict deadline to ensure that your child gets as close to the same level of education as children who do not have special needs.

If in doubt about the process and/or your rights and your child’s rights, refer to a special education attorney or advocate for assistance.

In the labyrinth of special education rules, regulations, facts and figures, the ordinary visitor is bound to overlook certain details. Even an experienced parent, who has been studying the details for some time may be surprised by what they find after extensive research.

Brush up on some laws and facts that you might have missed the first time reviewing all there is to know about special education. Below are some myths debunks, some facts uncovered, and some information reviewed about special education and learning disabilities.

1. Jean-Mark-Gaspard Itard, a French physician, is considered to be “The Father of Special Education.” Even though Special Education laws weren’t passed until 1975, with the Education of the Handicapped Act, Itard was attempting to educate children with mental disabilities in a systematic fashion as early as the late 1700s and early 1800s. He is particularly famous for his work with Victor, a feral child known as the “Wild Boy of Aveyron.” Itard developed a program, considered by many as the first attempt at special education, to teach Victor language and empathy.

2. More boys than girls are being diagnosed with learning disabilities. Nearly four times as many boys are diagnosed with LD, but that doesn’t mean that there’s a gender discrepancy in having a learning disability. It’s just that many girls are going unidentified or treated for their LD.

3. There aren’t waiting lists for special education. In fact, a “waiting list” for special education is illegal. A school must provide the appropriate IEP, resources, and teachers for a child that needs special education. Schools are permitted a certain time frame in which to evaluate the student, develop a personalized education program, and begin providing the services—anything that extends beyond that time frame violates the law.

4. If you disagree with the school’s proposed IEP, sign it immediately. This advice is counterintuitive, as you are unlikely to want to sign anything with which you disagree. However, in most states, signing it, including your concerns and then filing a complaint is the best course of action to address the issue immediately—otherwise, it is assumed that you have implied consent even without signing it. If you are not sure as to the process of filing a complaint or how to address a dissatisfactory IEP, contact a special needs advocate or attorney for advice and assistance.

5. You legally can bring anyone as an advocate to the IEP meeting. If you are the parent of a student with a disability, by law, you can bring whomever you want as an advocate. Ideally, you would want to bring someone who is familiar with the process, and some of the laws, and has the best interest of your child in mind. This is particularly important if you are very new to the process, are too “close” to the situation, or have established an adversarial relationship with the school.  This would also be a case where a special needs attorney or advocate would be useful as a neutral third-party, to protect the parent’s and student’s interests.

6. Children with severe disabilities do not need to attend a special school or center. A common misconception is that severely disabled children should be educated in a center designed for special education. Educators are unable to decide whether or not segregation is the best course of choice; however, by law, a child with special education needs must be educated with non-disabled children so long as he or she makes reasonable progress in his or her IEP goals with the aid of special supports and services. Only if the child is not making progress in a regular classroom setting will a special program of school be considered.

7. While people are aware of learning disabilities, they aren’t very familiar with the details. The NCLD survey found that 90 percent of respondents could identify dyslexia is a learning disability, and 80 percent could correctly define it, but most were far less familiar with other types like dysgraphia, dyscalculia, and dyspraxia.

8. You can ask for a new IEP meeting at anytime. You don’t have to wait until the next annual IEP meeting to make changes to the IEP. If you request a meeting, one must be held within 30 days. Any changes agreed upon during the meeting are added as an amendment to the original IEP.

9. Special education students do go onto college, even if the Special Education laws don’t extend to post-secondary schooling. Many colleges and universities offer support services for students with disabilities. And while only 10 percent of students with LD enroll in a four-year college program within two years of graduating (compared to 28 percent of the general population), 2004’s Individuals with Disabilities Education and Improvement Act (IDEA) specifically requires that students be prepared, as much as possible, during early schooling, for further continuing education and independent living.

10. Many people who have learning disabilities go on to become extremely successful, and in some cases, famous. Some of the greatest minds have had learning disabilities or other special education needs: Abraham Lincoln, Buzz Aldrin, Walt Disney, Albert Einstein, Sir Isaac Newton, Thomas Edison, Bill Gates, Henry Ford, Vincent Van Gogh are just a few of the notable names.

In the course of making sure your child gets all the assistance he or she needs, no stone should be unturned. Debunking myths, educating yourself on laws, and just picking up interesting factoids can help you be a better advocate for your child.